Complicated

My feeling now is totally complicated.
I hate this kind of feeling because I found that whenever I faced this feelings I will definitely don't know how to solve it or tell somebody although I think that I should have tell him/her.

I know that I have been laughing a lot lately.
Actually is I don't know how to show the real expression, that's why I choose to laugh or smile on whatever I faced in front of the crowd.
Most of you never notice this and you will just ask why am I keep laughing although that things is serious and I seems to be like not serious at all.

Seldom tell people what do I feel, if you are the unlucky one then I will tell you.
Hope you don't mind to become my unlucky friend, because if I tell you my story, I will still hiding something in there.
It is difficult to open heart to others.
I shall admit this sentence.
For me, I still haven't find a correct person to spell everything out no matter how privacy it is.
It is not easy to find one.
And I am looking for someone that I no need to spell everything out but he can understand me.
Because I really hate to spell things out, I rather keep them with me.

Telling the truth, actually my laughter is a fake.
What you see is just surface, but sometimes the laugh is real.
Hahax, nobody can see through this except for myself.
I think it is good too because seldom people cannot really get what I really feel.
Because sometimes they think that with a happy person then you will happy too.

Good~~~
I can make people happy although I am not 100% happy.
And I really happy with it.